Ann B's Ramblings

Nothing but Everything to Say !

2008-09-13T07:55:00.001-07:00

Liz has prompted bloggers to get blogging, so here I am.

I have so much bursting to say and yet I don't know how....so my blog today is I have Nothing and yet Everything to say and that is that !

The Last Choir Standing

2008-07-19T12:00:00.000-07:00

Tonight is the first time I have watched The Last Choir Standing from start to finish. What an inspiration they all are ! But the phrase that has prompted this blog is this from the leader of Sense of Sound group: "We are all individuals but with one voice".

They were all in shades of purple, all reflecting their own individuality through their dress but they were with "one voice" as they performed as a group.

I love that concept of celebrating our individuality alongside our "one voice"..... brings to mind
'Romford Salvation Army, Living as God's Family, Building His Kingdom'!

Lord show us how .....

Proverbs

2008-07-10T06:46:00.000-07:00

Never criticize a man until you've walked a mile in his moccasins.
American Indian Proverb

Reminding me to pray for our young people who are going to Zambia next week. Walking in their flip-flops!

Call on God, but row away from the rocks.
Indian Proverb

Reminds me that I have personal responsiblity as well as replying on God. We are the hands of Christ etc....

You've got to do your own growing, no matter how tall your grandfather was.
Irish Proverb

Back to previous blog about 'reputation'. Again a reminder, I have personal responsibility for my own spiritual life.

What you don't see with your eyes, don't invent with your mouth.
Jewish Proverb

Reminds me to guard my heart and mind in Christ Jesus.

Hold a true friend with both hands.
Nigerian Proverb

Reminds me to nurture my personal friendships.

Reputation

2008-06-24T11:06:00.000-07:00

I have been at yet another new ladies meeting today to talk about "The Salvation Army it's Beginnings and Symbols". They love The Salvation Army! One after the other say either one of their parents or their grandparents were members of TSA, or they say things like "My Dad told me never to pass a Salvation Army person by without giving them money".

All very humbling especially when they say "You do such good work" "You are the only Church who really get out there amongst the people"!

Deep inside me I want to shout - but WE DON'T..... we are riding on the reputation of those gone before and those in the Social Services who work their guts out to help the needy.

I know we are in a funny place at the moment, not in our own premises etc etc..... but my struggle with belonging to the Church side of our beloved Salvation Army, is that it is easy to ride on the same reputation The Salvation Army has because of it's social work.

I go to great lengths to say that Richard and I work within the Church side of the movement and that I actually know very little about the social work within the Territory - but I can get you the number of someone who does know more and can give an up-to-date talk!

Today highlighted for me again that yes...I want people to know we are just as much a Church as the Methodists, Baptists, CofE etc etc.....but I want to be a Church that bases its whole being on "With Heart to God and Hand to Man".

When my Grandchildren are giving talks about The Salvation Army to ladies groups.... I wonder what legacy my generation will have left them to talk about? Will it still be World War I and the Doughnut Girls in France or World War II with cups of tea in the trenches? or will it be Crest Cafe 2008 serving Breakfast to the needy while the Gospel Message is being preached? (William Booth would approve of this I am sure!) Will it be Romford congregation getting their hands dirty as they wash a tramps feet?

Sorry to go on a bit - but I just wanted to share the question going around in my head just now, whose reputation are we riding on? and for whose sake?

Oh and BTW..... I was persuaded to show them some moves with the tambourine ! How very very embarrasing.... that is one reputation I think needs to be squashed - TSA is not about bonnets, tambourines and bands playing on street corners....is it?

Cracked Pots

2008-06-17T07:32:00.000-07:00

Read this in the Adult and Family Ministries Resource book, thought I would share it with all the other crack'ed' pots out there !

The Water Bearer

A water bearer in China had two large pots, hung on each end of a pole, which he carried across his neck.

One of the pots had a crack in it while the other pots was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water. At the end of the long walk from the stream to the house, the cracked pot arrived only half full.

For a two years, this went on daily, with the bearer delivering only one and a half pots of water to his house. Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments, for which it was made. But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection, and miserable that it was able to accomplish only half of what it had been made to do.

After two years of what it perceived to be bitter failure, it spoke to the water bearer one day by the stream. ‘I am ashamed of myself, because this crack in my side causes my water to leak out all the way back to your house.’

The bearer said to the pot, ‘did you notice that there are flowers on your side of the path, but not on the other pot’s side? That’s because I have always known about your flaw, so I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back, you water them. For two years I have been able to pick these beautifulflowers to decorate the table. Without you being just the way you are, we would not have such beauty.’

Each of us has our own unique flaw. But it’s the cracks and flaws we each have that make our lives together so very interesting and rewarding. You’ve just got to take each person for what they are and look for the good in them.

That's what Grace is !

Grace & Forgiveness full and Free !

2008-05-31T09:19:00.001-07:00

Been staring out at my garden today. Recently have spent quite a bit of money and time on getting it looking better and more colourful. It is now a pleasure to look at. But this morning, I noticed the neighbours tall red rose bush is coming over our fence and adding a depth of colour to our garden - making it even more beautiful!

Our current sermon theme is "What's so amazing about Grace" and this week in our small groups we will be looking at Forgiveness when it seems impossible. As I looked at my garden and the colours of our own garden being so enhanced by the lovely red roses, I thought of God's grace enhancing our poor attempts at being Christlike....full of grace, truth and forgiveness !

So I have decided today, I want to be a rose ! Those who know me, if you see me being more like a weed - please just remind me of this blog :-)

Is God like a foreman?

2008-04-23T03:42:00.000-07:00

Just wondering if God is bit like a foreman? Yesterday we spoke to the foreman oversighting the bricking up of the new extension at the Hall. He was on the otherside of the road just observing the men as they worked. I guess he was just watching their workmanship and then would get involved if something was not going right.

Does God stand back and watch us and then step in if necessary? Or is he more hands-on than that?

Liberation

2008-04-19T02:50:00.001-07:00

I have realised again this week just how Liberal I am in my thinking. BUT I have just shocked myself at how alarmed I got just now when I found a black handled fork amongst the multi-coloured set !!! What is that all about :-)

Date Frustration

2008-04-10T03:28:00.000-07:00

We have just got back from a few days away in Bedford with my parents. It is always nice to be in Bedford - it has always held a special "default" setting for my family over the years. Anyway, the reason for blogging today is that as I reflect back on the days away I have a disappointment and a dilema (spelling?!) - one of the evenings Richard and I went out on a "date" lovely walk down by the river to a coffee lounge for a couple of hours on our own. This was lovely however I am sad because we just couldn't help but end up talking about our work, the corps, vision, officership, Army .... I am worried that having been work parterns for 15 years now, our lives are so entwined with "Army work" that the "we" we created in 1986 when we got married is being overtaken.

Not sure expressed all this very well - but any tips from those who perhaps are reading this and understand what I am trying to say would be gratefully received!

Also cross because a day that has been organised in Norwich for couples in ministry called "Life in the Fishbowl" looks really fab and potentially important for us to help work this type of thing out, is just not feasible for us!

God is good though and does work all things out for His purposes - He is faithful !

Music or No Music ?

2008-03-24T01:11:00.000-07:00

Easter Sunday was an interesting day for me. In the morning we shared with the URC congregation and experienced a special time around Communion and Blessing. There was dignity and freedom, some congregational singing of songs we didn't really know - so words had to be read and taken in.

In the evening we had our own service with a few of the URC joining us, which was great. We had every musical section on duty in an Easter Praise celebration. It was a good meeting, but my reflection today is - do we use music to generate emotions? By contrast to the many spoken words we heard in the morning in liturgical readings, do we allow our music to do the thinking for us?

Was there any point in allowing all the music sections to take part so often in one meeting? Why do we fill every moment with sound? There was a one point last night, to be perfectly honest, that I felt it was "battle of the bands"!

I wonder how we would cope without any music one Sunday? mmmmmmmmm

Lemonade

2008-03-06T12:08:00.000-08:00

I have a new favourite phrase....."If life gives you lemons, make lemonade"..... All I want to share with you, is that I am trying to make lemonade honest I am !!!

Sooo Trusting !

2008-02-13T12:53:00.000-08:00

A surreal thing happend to us on Monday. Edward, Richard and me went into London for the day. SP&S / IHQ / Tate Gallery / St Pauls then walked back to Liverpool Street to get train back home. Just before we got the train home we decided to have a drink in McDonalds at the station. As we were sitting there a well dressed gentleman came to the chair beside me and put a plastic bag and briefcase down on the table and said "would you mind just keeping an eye on these please while I go to the toilet and order my food?"....I promptly said "sure, that's fine, no problem".

The moment he left and disappeared out of sight we looked at each other and realised what a trusting thing I had just agreed to do....."What if this is not just an innocent couple of bags?" What if it is a.....whisper....bomb?" Realising that we had left Hannah at home on her own - I then said "you better take Edward and get the train...I'll meet you back home - can't risk all three of us getting blown up!"

The next 3/4 mins were taken up with Richard and I arguing over who would be most missed and who Hannah and Edward needed the most. Both of us had good arguments for the other person to be the one to stay with the children. Neither of us suggested that we ALL leave !

Just as it was beginning to become a bit of an issue - the very gentle man waved at us as he ordered his food and very soon had joined us and his bags once again. He said "Thank You" and I said "Your Welcome" and we quickly left to get our train. Little did he know the anxiety he had caused the three of us.

Very odd few mins - but on reflection - how sad it is that we now live in a world/society that makes us so suspiceous (hope I have spelt that right....mmm?). Would I say "yes" again....I don't actually think so !

A Family Night In

2008-01-28T11:44:00.000-08:00

I am just about to make a cup of tea and settle down for the evening after a days work....think to myself, "be nice to have an evening with the family".... but these days that generally means:-
Eldest child either on sofa or our bed with the laptop talking on MSN to her friends - far more exciting than real conversation with the family.
Youngest child doing homework and watching what he wants on the TV
Husband in and out of office answering building related emails, and then wanting sports on TV
ME....well, worst offender of all - since kids been home I have gone from kitchen, my computer, eat my tea, back to computer, hang washing up, back to computer....now I am ready to sit down and relax....rest of family settled in what they are doing - so I guess it is another night in with the family - at least we are in the same house :-)

Looking Good !

2007-12-12T12:00:00.000-08:00

I have just come back from weight watchers having only lost 1.5lbs this week ! Not too bad considering I have had a curry one night, Apple muffin and a meal at Frankie & Bennies on another day during that week. Funny how I expect more without trying harder :-) Just wonder if I do that with my spiritual life too - expect to be more spiritually in tune with very little effort mmmmmm !

SoF and the Bible !

2007-11-27T11:44:00.000-08:00

I am excited ! (is that a feeling word, I am using by any chance !!!) BUT a familier piece of scripture came a new to me yesterday at Mulberry House......not quite what I had expected from the choice to have a day out with God yesterday....but still this is the new revelation to me:-

Colossians 3:16
"Let the words of Christ, in all their richness, live in your hearts and make you wise. Use his words to teach and counsel each other. Sing Psalms (Scripture) Hymns (Song Book) and Spiritual Songs (Songs of Fellowship) to God with thankful hearts."

and then....

Ephesians 5:15-19
".....v18b let the Holy Spirit fill and control you. Then you will sing Psalms and Hymns and Spiritual Songs among yourselves, making music to the Lord in your hearts."

A little bit of everything is just what we need ! Perhaps we not on the wrong track after all :-)

Just a thought anyway.....

Feeling Numb

2007-11-19T10:59:00.000-08:00

Thought it was time for another blog but to be perfectly honest I am just feeling numb at the moment. Last week I physically experienced my skin being put to sleep in order for a mole to be removed....the Doc kept on asking "Can you feel that, can you feel this?" as he prodded me with a needle ... very quickly the answer was "no" and the job was done.

Reflecting on this experience I realise that at the moment this is exactly how I am feeling. Not feeling much at the moment....not sure why....is it self-preservation and protection from all that is being demanded of me at present? Is it just that I have shut down after a manic month of moving out of our building and other pressures? Have I given up? I hope NOT....but that's the point, I just don't know!

This is not intended as an alarm call - if you are a member of our congregation reading this, please don't worry....I am still functioning and love you all to bits....but have to be honest and admit that there is a part of me that has been put to sleep for a while - just praying hard it will wear off SOON !

Is it times like these that I just have to KNOW in my head and heart that I am been carried by God and those who are praying for me? Can I feel that? yes I can !

The Truth about Words

2007-09-27T00:35:00.000-07:00

I try not to allow myself to do this....but there are times when I stew over conversations I have had and wish I had said things differently....there is one particular conversation that has haunted me for 2 years now ! The main reason being is that the conversation ended in a bad way which will have left the group involved with a wrong impression of who I am or even how I feel - my own fault and the chances are that particular group (who I only see every2/3 years) will not have given it another thought since that day. ANYWAY...that is not the reason for my blogging today - the following is, but guess the above sets the context for why I felt I needed to blog:-

Whilst doing some housework last night, I found the following poem written by one of my children (I have permission to use it, by the way) :-

Truth

Sticks and stones may break my bones,
but words can also hurt me.
Stones and sticks break only skin,
while words are ghosts that haunt me.

Slant and curved the word-swords fall,
to pierce and stick inside me.
Bats and bricks may ache through bones,
but words can mortify me.

Pain from words has left its scar,
on mind and heart that's tender.
Cuts and bruises now have healed;
it's words that I remember.

WOW ! We have since discussed the circumstances that surrounded the writing of this poem and all is well. But what truth is contained in this very mature poem.

There are occasions when I over hear conversations about people and sometimes to people, that really are like a word-sword. I need the courage to challenge those conversations more.

Everyone at Church is equally important, whether we "like" them or not. Sometimes no words is as painful as harsh words....being ignored leaves its scar too.

Question for the day:- Do Actions really speak louder than words?
I think they do....BUT in the light of these feelings put down in a poem - I wonder !

Sorry this has turned into a mega-blog...thanks for taking the time to read and possibly comment.

My final prayer for myself today is "May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight O Lord".

Route Confirmation Part 2 ha ha ha ha ha !

2007-08-20T05:39:00.000-07:00

I have just read my blog "Route Confirmation" which I posted on 9th July and just burst out laughing !!! LoL..... :-) turn up at 3pm and follow directions for a stress free road trip - MY FOOT

Actually, as far as the information given to us is concerned and a very good Sat Nav (well almost very good) it was as easy as that BUT the lessons we have learned along the way have been invaluable. The main one being - total reliance on God.

No doubt Richard will blog along these lines at some point - when we catch up with emails etc ! But there have been a series of "unfortunate events" over the past 3 weeks that have taught us to completely trust in God to get us out of sticky situations ! Let me breifly outline a few for you:-

1. Hours before we are due to leave home - our clutch died on the very car we had registered to take with us on our 2,000mile round Europe trip !

2. On arriving in the town of our camp site in Lake Garda, we missed a turn. Sat Nav then redirected us to "Turn Right".....down an ever narrowing road, where the walls of the houses touched both wing mirrors (not in our own car either !), we pulled them in and I held my hand against my side to help Richard negotiate very Very VERY slowly past very uneaven stone walls (don't worry about my hands getting scrapped!). As we turned a very tight bend to the left we came to a dead end - Nowhere to turn the car around. Heart, Mouth, joined together, tears began to flow....panic set in in a variety of ways for each one of us...kids asking how we getting out of this - me shouting back - "we don't know, just stay calm for Daddy please !!!". Richard gets out of the car and walks back up the road - surveying the twists and turns ready to reverse back to a point where he could turn the car around inch by inch....the only way out was back up in reverse...so I walked behind the car directing Richard and all the while we are both praying our little socks off that God would somehow get us out of here - we were very tired, stressed and life was completely out of our control ! Just then a lady opened a window and smiling at us said something in Italian and pointed towards two very large doors that were opening by themselves....it was the opening to her beautiful courtyard which she was inviting us to reverse into in order to turn around and negotiate going back up this horrific road forwards.....God is closer than you think :-)

3. Arriving on site, we are told to drive to the very top of the hill for Canvas Holiday reception...we both looked up and up, saw very narrow road winding up and up - the smell from the clutch of the car that didn't belong to us was not pleasant - so we went. Half way up we decided to pull over (there was a space to do so) as the clutch really didn't smell nice. Richard decided to walk up to find reception - I was on the brink of tears once again, when a lovely English couple arrived and spent time listening to our woes and then reassuring us about the area and camp site etc (incidentally they live round the corner from Richard's family in Croydon). When Richard returned smiling - all was going to be well. We had pulled up outside our Tent and there was room to leave the car just next to us - we didn't have to take the car any further up hill ! Our neighbours turn out to be a lovely single parent family who used to live near Romford - we got on so well. She too listened as we downloaded our trauma of the journey. God is closer.....

4. On 7th August I learned that it is more blessed to give away....A new family arrived in the toilets without any toilet paper ! I gave away less than half a roll - not sure what else we had (10pm at night) but thought we could manage. In the morning I found some tissues but on my way back from the toilets - outside our tent was a FULL toilet roll ! God is closer.....

5. One of the rear tyres got a slow puncher ! Our Italian was not going to stretch that well to garage speak ! However, Richard pumped the tyre up and we took the car out in order to visit another town on the Lake and as we went we prayed....Lord point us to a tyre garage that speaks English and will understand what help we need. You guessed it, Just there beside the road was an Italian Kwick Fit type place - one man band - but this one man spoke English and within 40mins we were done and dusted and back on the road and only 20Euros lighter. God is closer....

There are a number of little stories I could tell - situations that have stretched us beyond our comfort zone and that have taught us that God is in control. Read Richard's blog for his take on it all.

This has been the most exciting, terrifying and restful holiday we have had as a family ever.... think the kids have got the message too that God is certainly closer than we think or remember.

Thanks for taking the time to read- hope I have not bored you too much :-)

Marrow Confusion !

2007-07-12T08:45:00.000-07:00

I have been donated a rather large Marrow......what does one do with it ? :-)

Route Confirmation

2007-07-09T07:36:00.000-07:00

We received all the information we need for our Europe Trip today. Maps outlining our three day journey down to Lake Garda. Map reference points for each night stop over etc etc....it is all in the bag (well wallet thing !) all we have to do is follow directions closely, arrive after 3pm at each stop over and we will reach our destination, unstressed and safely !

Oh that life in general could be that mapped out and stress free :-)

Loss of Human Contact

2007-06-27T11:59:00.000-07:00

Hi....I am frustrated and also intreged (spelling?) this week! I have just joined FaceBook - much to my frustration! However, I am also very excited to see some long lost friends still accepting me as one of their friends, even after many years of not actually seeing them face to face. FaceBook is addictive and we have had to put in some home ground rules (well we will do!) and a great way to keep in touch - with pictures too !

BUT I am afraid this is the beginning of the end of human contact. Will we - or the next generations to come - loose the art of face to face conversation and interaction?

It is very easy to type away your feelings etc etc....but quite another thing to actually talk to someone about them.

I had the privilege of meeting with someone for 2 hours this afternoon for a catch-up chat (the biggest and bestest bonus of my job!) and it just prompted me to blog these thoughts. Interacting in conversation, body language, laughter, tears etc etc....personal sharing one to one....must not be allowed to be replaced by our internet relationships!

FaceBook and Blogging are fantastic means of communication but I must be careful never to use these internet "conversations" as a substitute to either a phone call or a face to face chat.

Sorry, Love, Hate and Want

2007-06-21T06:45:00.001-07:00

I am struggling with the word Sorry ! We teach our children to say sorry when they do something wrong - to own up and apologise etc etc....but then comes "sorry" said after every conversation involving asking the children to do anything - even take their dishes out to the dishwasher ! "Sorry" is not what I want to hear then - it is action I want to see......sorry should be kept for occasions of remorse and learning - shouldn't it? Or kept for occasions when we are sorry 'about' something that perhaps touches us on the news or about our friends etc.

The word LOVE is also a struggle. Why is the English language so restrictive? I love chocolate and cosy nights in, I love my family, but when I say the words "I Love You" when I drop the children off to school after they have really upset me - LOVE means so much more than it sounds when it comes out of the mouth.

HATE such a strong word. Yet I have realised I use it so often....but in terms like, I hate Gallows Corner...will avoid it at every cost - as Dawn well knows! I hate listening to Charlie on Big Brother - she is driving me mad! I hear myself saying "hate" quite a lot recently and I 'hate' myself for it ! It is such a harsh word to form as you say it and even to hear it spoken...such a strong harsh word. But when I use it I don't really hate at all.....that sentiment is just not within me - I don't hate a thing really......what other word should I use I wonder ?

"I want never gets".....I was brought up with this phrase....now I can't even use that phrase to express what I do really want. I end up using words like "I should" "I ought" "I better" "they expect"....I was asked by a professional Life Coach two weeks ago "What do you want ? Use the phrase I want to...." I couldn't bring myself to even utter those words! Something else for me to work on then!

Perhaps I should start speaking in Swahilli again - perhaps would express myself better :-)

Liberated !

2007-06-17T07:11:00.000-07:00

I had a very liberating experience yesterday...I had my bra size measured ! I discovered that I have been wearing the wrong size for the last three years (shame, that is the last time I got measured!) NO wonder I have not been feeling that comfortable - but fancy sticking with it for three years (obviously have bought new ones in that time - didn't want you to think I have kept same ones for three years). So obviously it was not that bad, but I just knew something was wrong...I put it down to additional weight and gravity :-)

Anyway after an hour of trial and error and being observed by a complete stranger who kept pulling the straps etc etc, I finally came away with my right size and a couple additions to my wardrobe.....dont want to use the B word too often as I know Graeme Howell in particular will get embarrased as he reads this !

Now...is it feasible that we can be in a ministry "wrong fit" ? I wonder how many of us have felt this or feel it right now - that we are just not quite in the right "ministry fit" ? Please don't take this as an indication that I am feeling in a "wrong fit" at Romford - I am NOT feeling that, far from it .....but the hour in M&S "B" fitting service has made me wonder if it is possible to carry on in a particular ministry, but not quite feeling as Liberated and "close fitted" as we should?

Does God provide a "Fitting Service" ? How willing are we to throw away the wrong fit and pick up the new? How willing are we to allow God to "pull our straps".

Tagged AGAIN

2007-05-29T10:46:00.000-07:00

Am not near an actual book.....nearest thing to this computer is the Tune Book so have looked at tune 161 instead...."We'd better bide a wee" ! :-)

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha wetting myself now :-)

Not going to tag anyone else - sorry !

Tagged

2007-05-28T13:44:00.000-07:00

Kirsty has Tagged me....I think I have to do the following and post it as a blog - been a day off today, so half brain that normally does work is not working today, anyway...

Here's is what this is about - the rules:

Grab the book closest to you
Turn to page 161
Print the 5th complete sentence on your blog
Tag 5 others.

So here is my tag:

"I am reluctant to leave that box all this time." ('Sovereign' by C.J. Sansom)

Don't know how to provide 5 proper links....but hope that Richard, Fiona, Jenny, Zoe and Ed will do this.

Sorry if I have missed the blot completely !

The Naked Pastor

2007-05-22T13:08:00.000-07:00

Been looking at various people's list of recommended bloggers and someone has called themselves The Naked Pastor...I have not actually clicked on to their blog yet, but it sparked me thinking about the pros and cons of being a "naked" pastor. A few years ago I was worshiping with the Icthus Community who Graeme Kendrick belongs to (think he does anyway) this was taking place in the William Booth College Assembly Hall. During sung worship I noticed a lady dancing uninhibited at the back of the hall, totally lost in worship.....and I thought to myself, 'that is what David meant when he said that he was dancing naked before the Lord' - no inhibitions - an audience of ONE with God.

So being a Naked Pastor touches me on two levels - how "naked" am I in worship and how "naked" am I when coming alongside people in pastoral way. My prayer is always that I will be authentic and genuine at all times - why then do I find it so hard to be totally free to be "dance naked before the Lord" ? Maybe it is something to do with having to lead worship - when do I actually worship myself ? mmmmmm

Am I Ready ?

2007-05-02T13:16:00.000-07:00

An interesting thing happened to me today (as if that doesn't happen every day !). Arrived back from dropping kids off at YP Band and saw our neighbours walking back to their house from a family stroll around the estate. They explained that they had been looking for a bigger house and had seen one like ours up for sale. Bonnie went on to ask me details about the sizes of rooms in our house etc etc......I then said - "would you like to come and have a look around?" WHAT WAS I SAYING ?- haven't tidied house properly for over a week and every room was (in my eyes) an absolute tip! What state was our bedroom in? Oh help how do I get out of this one? Well, I didn't she was obviously interested and said - "that would be great thanks!" SO before I had chance to get in the house and just double check etc - we were ALL walking into the house......so I reaffirmed they were very welcome in my home, but "please excuse the mess as we are a very busy family home !" For the next half hour I walked our neighbours through our house, room by room....including seeing the ant powder I had had to sprinkle all over the living room floor and coffee table just prior to YP Band !

Fortunately they are a lovely family and we get on very well with them. They accepted us as we were and understood our busy life and in fact Bonnie was very kind and said "Its not as bad as all that!" Incidentally Jamie is a Fireman and inspected our alarms while he was at it ! The one downstairs has been disconnected from mains as well as battery and I didn't even know we had one downstairs (4 years on..!)

ANYWAY why has this prompted a blog? It has prompted me to think about how ready am I for Jesus if He were to come back tonight? what "spiritual mess" would He find? What excuses would I give? mmmmmmm will continue to ponder on these things. Am I Ready? Are you Ready?

360 profile

2007-04-26T13:38:00.000-07:00

I have learned today that there is no such thing as failure just feedback ! Interesting :-)
Do I like Feedback? Well, I certainly hate failure ! Today has been helpful though to put some things into perspective and to have "space" to give myself a kick up the backside vocationally speaking ! Thank you to those of you out there who took part in my 360 profile, really appreciate your feedback and want to assure Romford SA I will do my best for you all (and God of course !). Luv ya

Mum's the word and loneliness

2007-04-22T14:26:00.000-07:00

Two things on my mind today....Firstly, couple times recently I have heard children call their parent by their first name and not "Mum". I think this is really sad. There are only two people in the world who have the right to call me "Mum" - and that is really special to me. I just felt when I heard their first names being used by their child that a line was being crossed and a devaluing of "Mum" was taking place.....probably being silly - but just the way I feel about it. I know a 59 year old who sometimes refers to her Mum as "Mummy"...now that may be a little bit odd but part of me loves that too - because "Mummy" is even more special because for me it is even more intimate. Secondly, I have been involved in a few conversations today about loneliness and how even within a Church fellowship such as ours, some are not totally embraced.....touched a few raw nerves and realised that maybe I understand more than they actually will ever know - made me realise too how "closed" some hanging about groups are after the meeting....how do we put this right? BUT I also know that each one of us (including myself) needs to make however we want the fellowship to be, happen - we have to make it happen for ourselves too.

Tomorrow

2007-04-15T13:08:00.000-07:00

"Tomorrow never comes" .... sometimes I wish that were really true, because our tomorrows do come and we do have to face whatever that particular "tomorrow" promises/demands. The amazing thing is that at the end of the "tomorrow" I look back and realise that God's grace is just there bringing me through - All things come to pass! This of course applies to both the "tomorrows" we look forward to as well as the ones we don't.....so I need to grasp each "tomorrow" and make it the best "present" that I can because each day/opportunity to live life to the full is very quickly over........can you believe that we are nearly at the end of April already!!

ME again !

2007-03-29T07:50:00.000-07:00

I am muzing about ME again today - because this afternoon I am leading an O60s group and have decided to share a talk I was asked to do about 2 years ago to a bunch of retired SA Officers - entitled "My Life as an Officer's Child". They wanted me to share experiences of being what we call in the SA "An OK".

So I have a powerpoint presentation outlining my life so far - a few video clips that are mildly amuzing - especially a scene of one of our family holidays in Mombasa where my brothers were particularly unkind to me by throwing my fav doll into the sea etc etc...

BUT anyway, I am left thinking - do people really want to know about my life? It is boring for me to talk about - but realise that perhaps to someone who has never been outside Romford, it may sound quite an exciting life.

Question to pose today is - Do experiences shape you?

I guess the answer is Yes....so what experiences am I providing for myself and my family that will enhance and not harm in the future?